Standing up in Afghanistan
Chris Serico • The Journal News • Aug. 3, 2008 • Photo: Carucha Meuse/TJN
It’s one thing to bomb as a performer, but after a recent United Service Organizations trip to Afghanistan, veteran stand-up comedian Nick Di Paolo now knows what it’s like to be bombed.
Over a tuna club sandwich at Ossining’s Landmark Diner, the northern Westchester resident reflected on how he and other regulars from Howard Stern’s radio show were cleared from enemy fire just minutes after finishing a comedy gig for American troops stationed in Kandahar.
“We were told (before the attack) that it happened to Toby Keith,” Di Paolo, 46, said. “And we thought, ‘What are the odds that’ll happen again?’ “
Di Paolo, fellow stand-ups Artie Lange, Dave Attell and Jim Florentine, and Stern’s radio producer Gary “Baba Booey” Dell’Abate left the stage July 1 and headed to a meet-and-greet when the base faced enemy mortar fire. Soldiers shuttled them to a bunker, where they took cover from a half-hour’s worth of shelling before it stopped and they emerged uninjured.
“We’re in there signing autographs and stuff,” Di Paolo said. “They didn’t seem too nervous. We were crapping our pants, but the soldiers were fine.”
A New Englander who played football at the University of Maine, Di Paolo honed his gritty, unflinching act in Boston comedy clubs. He spent some 12 years living in Manhattan — where he briefly roomed with comedian Louis C.K. — before justifying his move to Westchester about six years ago.
“I grew up in the suburbs of Boston, and I like trees,” he said. “… I don’t want to deal with tunnels and bridge traffic. That, and the Landmark Diner.”
A few months ago, he agreed to head to Afghanistan for a one-week USO tour that began June 28. He had twice toured with the USO, one to Guantanamo Bay and another to Japan, but said his wife, Andi Hughes, was concerned for his safety this time around.
“I wasn’t worried,” he said. “It’s the U.S. military; it’s not like the Eagle Scouts are guarding us.”
But soon after he arrived, Di Paolo and his fellow comedians realized the gravity of the situation.
“We went in a month when more U.S. guys were killed there than in Iraq,” he said.
Di Paolo said he was overwhelmed by the dedication and sacrifices of American military personnel. The comedians posed for photos with soldiers, collected commemorative coins and autographed a 500-pound bomb that he was told killed eight insurgents later in the week.
“Imagine getting killed by a bomb signed by Baba Booey?” he said. “How embarrassing.”
Via email, Attell raved about Di Paolo’s comedy and touted his love of weaponry.
“I have seen him kill on Letterman and HBO, but I don’t think I have ever seen him more excited and happy (than) when he got a chance to shoot machine guns out the door of a Blackhawk helicopter,” Attell wrote. “Thank God he’s on our side.”
Although Di Paolo said he was aiming for a desolate hill, his trigger-happy ways nearly got him and the soldier who allowed him to fire in trouble.
“When we landed, I saw him getting a little bit of a talking to from his superior,” he said. “It turns out I shot out over a village. ‘Comedian Nick Di Paolo starts international incident.’ Wouldn’t it have been funny if I picked off (Osama) bin Laden by accident? That would have been a story for my press kit, huh?”
Not that it needs much help. Di Paolo has headlined three Comedy Central specials, been nominated for two Emmys as a writer for “The Chris Rock Show” on HBO, and on April 5 performed for more than 6,000 people at the Gibson Amphitheatre in Los Angeles.
But there is a gig that has eluded him lately: Di Paolo is continuing a quest to get his daily radio show back on the air.
Four months into working as a talk-show host afternoons on FreeFM, the show was building momentum and helping him sell out comedy clubs. But when the station abruptly changed formats from talk to predominantly rock music, Di Paolo and most of the station’s talk-show hosts lost their jobs.
On Monday, Di Paolo piloted a one-hour radio show on Howard 100, one of Stern’s Sirius satellite channels. In the year ahead, he hopes for more exposure as a host and to release a comedy DVD.
But if the USO comes calling again, he just might have to report for duty.
“If they ask me again if they want me to go to Iraq,” he said, “I’d go in a second, just after seeing what they do for us.”
